You showing up for you..

I have been a bit incommunicado over the last months… Like a lot of us these days, I find myself pining for my old life and finding it really damn hard to constantly pivot, change directions and change plans.. yet again. Know what I mean?

I, like all of us, had to cancel A LOT of things the last 2 years. Some of this was personal but also quite a lot professionally. I found that this constantly changing and cancelling state of things led me to general feeling of unreliability. The things I was used to happening - whether that was sweeping out of town to teach a retreat, visit a friend, or hold an in-person coaching or teaching event - was just not reliable. It may happen. But it was quite likely that it may not too.

Of course as yogis, we know that impermanence, or the lack of “reliability” of things in the sensory/material/ever-changing world is always there. We think our laptop is reliable for us because we turn it on every day and it works. And when it has a little bug, usually a simple reboot does the trick and it’s back and firing again. Until it’s not. That day where you turn on your computer and you get the sad mac - it looks like this :( - and even a trip to the Mac store won’t bring this impermanent thing back to life.

The computer was never infallible. It never gave us a lifetime promise of working. We were also never given a lifetime guarantee that our way of life would always be the way it was. But that makes it no less sad and just plain hard to sit with the changing and impermanent nature of daily life these days, ya know?

I noticed that I had to cancel so many things, I seemed to lose my internal commitment to many things.. Some of my daily and weekly routines I used to diligently follow - like reading inspirational books and podcasts, meditating with my favorite teacher, not drinking wine during the week - I became less and less reliable to. My inner world was starting to mirror more (my perception of) the outer world. I was in a rut. And as a person who doesn’t believe in ruts, that is not the best place.

So how did I get out of it? Realization helped. :) And then I started really slow (kaizen - small tiny step) style to change a few things I knew needed a shake up. I bought a Peloton (LOVE it!! Obsessed!). I gave up chocolate (Yes, I did that. Chocolate FIEND) and now I am giving up alcohol for a month. These little changes have slowly grown into bigger changes and a better all-around feeling for myself. But more importantly, I got back a lot of the trust I had in myself that I would do the things I said I would do. Inner reliability.

Can you relate at all? The New Year is nearly upon us and I, for one, am moving into it rut-free. I have taken a bit of a break from group health coaching to focus on my intensive Nutrition program. But Guess what? I am bringing it back! It will be 6 weeks, starting Sundays March13 (deets below) and focus on daily habits for a thriving body, mind and spirit. And I will add in some pretty life-changing gems gleaned from nutrition school. I will be offering discounted private health coaching to new clients interested in working 1:1 with me, combining science-backed nutrition with the timeless age-old knowledge of Ayurveda. I don’t advertise this so much as word-of-mouth seems to work for me just fine, but if you want to chat more about it, reply to this message and learn how you can get 30% off working with me privately.